Rather than 'have to,' consider 'get to'

With nine people in my household at one point, laundry was one of my biggest jobs on a regular basis. Just to keep on top of things, at least two days a week were devoted to sorting, washing, folding and when I could put off no longer, ironing. As you can imagine, laundry was a never-ending chore.

On more than one occasion as I stood over a lump of clothes piled high on my dining room table, I may have lamented on the number of hours of my life I was “wasting” on laundry. Hours which could have been spent on...oh, I don’t know...learning to cha-cha or writing the next great American novel or mastering my French accent.

But then my husband noted wisely -- which he does every so often -- I should see laundry as a blessing. I get to do laundry because I have been blessed with seven healthy children who are active and get their clothes dirty. I get to do laundry because we have enough money for clothes for all of them to get dirty. I get to do laundry using a washing machine rather than schlepping down to the creek to rub the clothes between two rocks. Instead of focusing on what was wrong, I could instead be grateful for what was good.

Of course, I don’t remember if he shared this bit of wisdom as he was in the kitchen doing dishes or if he shouted it from the living room where he was watching TV.

Regardless, it was a good reminder that a positive perspective on your situation can drastically alter your mood, can change how you feel about what you are doing, and can determine how you move forward in your life.

By simply switching from the attitude of “have to” do something versus “get to” do something can cause you to view the situation in an entirely new light.

For example, McCook’s Heritage Days celebration is quickly approaching at the end of the month, which of course means the Heritage Days Parade.

The thought of “having to” design and build a float may fill some with dread. Instead, you could think of it as an opportunity to “get to” show your creativity and flair. If creativity isn’t your forte, think of it as an opportunity to reach out to someone who is good with crepe paper and balloons and get them involved.

Or view it as a chance to sample a variety of different candy to toss to the parade-goers. You don’t “have to” try every flavor of dum-dums lollipops; instead, you “get to” sample them all, just for quality control.

Side note: Several years ago, I crossed an item off my bucket list with a visit to the Rose Bowl Parade in Pasadena, California, so I am a bit biased toward parades and floats, but everyone should still consider entering a float in the McCook Chamber’s Heritage Days Parade at the end of the month.

What brought the concept to mind recently of switching from “have to” to “get to” was my involvement (for the fifth time) with the McCook Senior Parents, who have traditionally served food at the varsity football games as a fund-raiser.

When I took on the task at the last minute a few weeks ago, many wondered why I added to my workload. At a minimum, both my husband and I felt the food was a service to the community which needed to be continued. But it was also a simple opportunity that I “get to” do, not that I “have to” do.

As an added bonus, I am working with a great group of Class of 2022 parents who stepped up quickly to make the dinner happen on extremely short notice. None of these people “had to” do it. Instead, they chose to do it and eagerly joined in once everything got rolling. Not only was it a fun opportunity, but I was also grateful to be surrounded by both experienced and newbie parents, who chose to work hard both for their senior high students and for the community.

I realize not everything we do in our daily lives can be put in a positive light, but there are many opportunities to shift our thinking about the situation to an attitude of gratefulness, to celebrate what we do have rather than focusing on what we don’t, and to consider that we don’t “have to” do something - we “get to” do something.