The Me2 movement

Most normal people agree that no one should be forced to do anything they don’t want to do by someone else. And that’s especially true in the gender battles that have been going on for decades now because of man’s perceived superior position over women. So it wasn’t surprising to see the Me2 movement erupt at a time where women are finally standing up for themselves and being heard.

My only concern is that some of these women claiming sexual harassment aren’t telling the truth. There are several reasons to lie about anything from wanting to be one of the victims to seeking out headlines for themselves. Typically in our legal system this isn’t a problem because each case is investigated by trained police officers and detectives along with the prosecuting attorney and misstatements are quickly identified and dismissed.

Unfortunately, one of the few sexual harassment cases that ended in a guilty verdict in a court of law involved Bill Cosby, a comedian for the ages who is now 81. I’ve heard many people allege that even an 81 year old guy who is known and famous world-wide wouldn’t have to force himself on any woman, especially going so far as using a drug to incapacitate her so he could have sex with her. But the jury disagreed with that argument, found him guilty on numerous counts and he now awaits incarceration when his appeals are exhausted which more than likely means he will die in prison if that’s where he ends up.

But all these other cases surrounding the Me2 movement have been handled extra-judiciously with Harvey Weinstein the only male facing criminal charges at this time. That means that men’s lives, careers, and families have been ruined due to something much closer to gossip than truth and that’s never been the way the system of redress works in this country. Certainly we develop opinions when we hear negative things about people, whether those things are true or not, and our opinions influence the way we see and define those people from then on. But typically if their offense is serious enough to be brought to trial, there will be a verdict that will tend to temper and influence our perception and definition of that person. In the Me2 movement, criminal charges for the most part are not being brought and verdicts are not being rendered.

When things like this occur in the public eye, it causes all of us to reflect back on our own behavior and ask ourselves were we ever guilty of doing the things that other people are now being accused of. I can truthfully say no. Even during my teen-age years, I was aware of the rules governing male-female relationships and knew beyond a shadow of a doubt which girls would submit and which wouldn’t. Knowing that, I never forced myself on anyone and in talking with my friends, they report they didn’t either.

Now I realize that we were not in positions of power and control with the girls’ future hanging in the balance depending on how she responded to us but harassment is essentially the same whether you have ultimate power over someone or no power at all. Some men will attempt to use their perceived power against people they believe are more or less powerless whether they can influence that person’s future and livelihood or not. But that’s only some men and certainly not all men. In talking to others, I believe that most men are like my friends and I, taking only what others are willing to give with no thought at all to forcing someone to do something against their will.

So I wonder, as many men do, how many times simple flirting is misinterpreted as sexual harassment, causing much pain and humiliation to some men who didn’t deserve that kind of judgment. We must be able to discern between the two with official declarations of guilt or innocence far beyond the whims of public opinion.

To judge before the fact, based only on someone’s interpretation of wrongdoing, doesn’t bring justice to anyone.