Quick to judge

So every week I wonder, what will happen this week that I will feel I need to write about. And every week, I never have to worry because something happens to give me something to share. So this week I was wondering if I should write about Christmas or New Years and all the hubbub a mom goes through during the holiday season. Like should I write about all the food and weight gain and overindulged kids, then carry on and on about the standard holiday complaints. But then I remembered how much I enjoyed the holiday season. All of it! I love the true spirit of Christmas when friends and family get together and put aside their differences and conflicts and just enjoy the moments. And how sad I was that it was over and everyone goes back to reality.

And instantly I was reminded how quickly people’s joyful and loving and lighthearted spirits can change. How quickly people go back to hating and judging and criticizing, and sometimes I think moms can be the worse. How quick we are to judge another mom’s decision or actions. Not that we’re always wrong, but just maybe the mom who’s kid came to Walmart without a coat on, was not actually being negligent but coming to Walmart to buy her child a coat? Or maybe the mom who was ignoring her crying 3-year-old at McDonald's had been putting up with tantrums all day and refused to give in to her child’s demands so she was going to let the child cry it out, maybe actually eat her first meal of the day. Who knows? But who am I to judge? Like I was the perfect parent. None of us are.

Or witnessing the judging parents that assumed since one of their daughter’s teammates showed up late for practice all week, that she was irresponsible and her parents didn’t care about her sports, when in reality, the girl was helping take care of her sick parents and her only way of transportation would make her a few minutes late to practice. Or the parents that hated on the kid who didn’t play very well in the ball game last week and made outward comments to the audience about it, when unbeknownst to them, that same kid had been battling the flu all week and was functioning on a very small amount of sleep. Everyone has their own situation yet us parents are quick to judge without ever really knowing the real story.

I am guilty of judging, just as much as the next guy, maybe more and I admit it. I just noticed that during the holidays, people just seemed more accepting and more kindhearted, including myself but then all of the sudden, the negativity and fingerpointing and judging was back. I just realized how quick we can be to assume and put people in categories when never knowing the truth. The New Year is about starting over and examining our lives and listing things we think we can work on. Last time I checked it’s not about examining other’s and figuring out what they need to work on or pointing out what we think is wrong with them. As moms, we are more powerful than we realize and can make the choice to stop judging and assuming and be more accepting and loving. It can only do us good, and our families good, to at least start out that way and hope for the best in others as well.

May your New Year be blessed with an open and loving heart free from judgment and negativity! Matthew 7:1-5