Disappearing act

A mom friend of mine recently texted after a crazy busy week and asked if I remembered the news stories about moms who suddenly disappear and then are found states away with no excuse why they left. She said she understood them now, so I responded by asking her where she was. She stated Vancouver. Jokingly, we shared texts of fictional places we were currently and how much we were enjoying it. Then I read an article online about the struggles of being a mom with young kids and that you weren’t alone if you felt like just getting in the car and leaving.

So today, as I was driving all over town, running here and there, trying to juggle all the to-do’s and make everyone happy, the thought crossed my mind, “What if I just kept driving?” I had a full tank of gas, some good tunes playing through the speakers and a big icey drink. Why not? Where would I go? When would they notice and try to contact me? What would they say? I remembered those news stories of the moms that disappeared, willingly, and when they find them, they’re always smiling in their picture. They were not hiding in some cave crying. They obviously needed a break, found a cool place to disappear, and were not regretting their decision at all.

Years ago, I watched a tv show about a mom who decided to take a sabbatical. Went and lived by herself for 8 or 9 months in some other country and then came back, basically a renewed spirit and better mom. At the time I thought, “What a nut job!” But now that I’ve been a mom for 18 years, I kinda get it. Not saying I could do that, but I get it.

Then my favorite true story ever, which I believe I’ve mentioned before, from my friend whose grandmother calmly asked her husband to pull over on their way home from their week-long family vacation in the mountains, only to get out of the car, shut the passenger door, and walk into forest and disappear for a week. She had had it with her kids and husband, obviously, couldn’t mentally stand the hours-long trek home so removed herself from the situation by trudging through the forest and returning home a week later when she felt she was ready to be a mom again. That’s classic!

I know many moms will shake their head at the thought of just disappearing but I bet there are many more who understand or have at least thought about it once or twice during their parenting years. Being a mom is the hardest job in the world if you’re doing it right, AND add that to careers and marriage and a 1,000 other commitments and you can see why a woman may just vanish temporarily. But I just think it’s interesting how before becoming a mom when I would hear the news stories about moms disappearing, I chalked those women up to psychos that should have never had kids if they were just going to abandon them. How dare they? But now, when I hear about it, and see their smiling faces on the news, I nod my head, “Yep, I get it.”

Personally, I’m too much of a control freak to ever just take off leaving my family to fend for themselves, but I’m not gonna judge those moms that do. The sane ones will return, of course, because they love their kids and their lives and just needed a timeout. Maybe the disappearing act is good for their soul, who knows?! But I certainly get it!