Keeping a laundry list

Apparently, when you become a mom and chose to do the family's laundry, since no one else can seem to do it right, you have to keep a running inventory in your head of all items you launder and know their whereabouts at all times. I didn't realize this until recently and apparently I'm failing in that category of my job.

For example, my middle daughter has accused me twice this week of losing her clothes. "Where's my navy tank top?" she asked accusingly the other day. Gosh, dear, I only did 32 loads of laundry this last weekend, I can't believe I can't remember if I did or did not wash a navy tank top among the 367 articles of clothing that went through my hands. But I don't say that and instead go through the usual questions with her, did you check your clean basket, did you check the dirty clothes basket, did you hang it up, did you wear it, did you ask your big sister? She runs back through the house, double checking all those things to no avail and returns asking, "It's nowhere. Did you do something with it?" What does she think I'm gonna say, "Ya, actually, I tried wearing it under my new sweater but ended up tearing it in two cause it was too small so now I'm using it as a dust rag. Bummer for you." Geesh! No, instead I got mad and replied, "NO, if I even touched the tank top at all, then I would have washed it, dried it, folded it and put it in your basket! Where it goes from there, is up to you."

Then last night it was a pair of black running shorts. Her question to me at 8:55pm while I'm in the shower (because privacy means nothing in my house), "Where's my black Nike shorts?" I ask her to clarify which ones, the all black or ones with gray? She says the all black. I nicely explain, with shampoo running down into my eyes and the cold air filling the bathroom from her holding the door wide open, "I put the ones with gray in your PE bag and the all black ones in your clean clothes basket." She immediately responds, "No you didn't, they're not in my basket or the laundry room or the dirty clothes." Sorry, sister, but this time I remembered the exact shorts and remembered exactly where I put them since I set aside her PE clothes for the week. She wasn't gonna win on this one! I firmly replied, "I put them in your basket on Saturday, that's the last time I seen them." She stomped off in a huff, leaving the bathroom door still somewhat open for me to freeze. Later she caught me again in the kitchen, now after 9:30pm. "I still can't find them, are you sure you didn't do something with them?" she judgmentally asked with a glare in her eye, secretly blaming me, the sole laundry worker, for always misplacing her clothes.

If I was in a good mood, I might have sarcastically said, "Well, ya know what, I just got sick of doing everyone's laundry and decided ya'll have too much stuff so from now on I've been taking 2-3 items of clothing each week and donating them. Sorry! Your shorts are probably on their way to New Guinea by now." However, I wasn't in a good mood by that time and didn't appreciate the lack of respect, so instead I barked at her for accusing me for losing her stuff all due to her lack of organization and suggested she give up her search and come up with a new outfit. Then out of the clear blue sky, she walked downstairs this morning wearing THE very black Nike shorts she accused me of losing! "Found your shorts, I take it?" I asked. "Yep," she abruptly replies. They were in her clean clothes basket the whole time.

Hmm? Who's the winner? Me! Guess I'm gonna have to have a sit down with my girls about the amount of work it takes to do all their blasted laundry and that's it's impossible to keep list of every item laundered. Or else, I may be donating some favorite things here and there!