Batten down the hatches

Many moons ago, there was a time when I felt tired and considered my day done, that I simply waltzed off to bed. Yes, sure, I had to shut off the TV, click off a light or two, put on some pajamas and brush my teeth, but a maximum of four to five things, and I was off to dreamland.

Three kids and 13 years later and my nightly checklist has quadrupled. Any busy mom knows what I'm talking about. And let me stress the word "mom" because no one else in the house has quite the checklist. When I sing the announcement every night, "Girls, time to brush teeth and head to bed," that's literally about the extent of their responsibilities. Aside from their showers and pj's, when the official bedtime bell rings, all they have to do is peel themselves off the couch, swirl a toothbrush around their pearly whites, and flop into bed. Voila! I do the rest; shut their curtains, turn off their lights, turn on fans, shut their closet doors because that's scary to have those open, ya know, and whatever else is needed to make their slumber peaceful. Almost the same is true for Hubby. His nightly checklist is a shower and teeth brushing and if I didn't make him shut off the bedroom light every night, then that would be it. Sometimes he has to shut off the TV or living room light but what's that take, 3.7 seconds?

Then there's me. I have to start an hour early so as to not go over my expected time for nighttime rest. After showering and getting pj's on, I begin my nightly shutdown. I start upstairs with the kids, make sure all lights are off, bathroom counters are cleared (why I do that, I'm not sure but I do), and clear doorways and hallways from potentially hazardous tripping items, because ya never know who might have to rush to the bathroom in the middle of the night or haul buns out of a dark house in case of fire, and heaven forbid there be a laundry basket or pair of shoes that would make a hurried person fall.

Then I move to the living room, tidy up a little, fluff a few pillows, draw the drapes, hunt down the remote for easy access in the morning, chuck a few shoes towards the closet and out of the middle of the floor, scoop up the kids' bedtime snack trash, lock the front door, flip on the porch light for safety, and then finally shut off all the lights. Next is the kitchen and dining room. I clear off the table so there's room for everyone to eat breakfast, lay out any important papers that are needed for school or work, shut the curtains (first, taking a quick glance out in backyard to make sure all is well), shove any remaining dishes into the dishwasher and get it ready to run, re-read the school lunch menu, determine if a quick sack lunch is needed to be made to save time in the am, pop out into the garage and make sure all doors are locked and outside lights on, flip on small light above sink because you never know who might need to access the kitchen in the middle of the night, blow out any candles, and FINALLY ... flip off the kitchen and dining room lights.

THEN, head to family room where Hubby is lounged on the couch; make sure TV is off, computers shut up, blankets folded, pillows situated, leftover drinking glasses taken back to the empty kitchen sink, and lights off. Finally, once the house is fully transformed to sleep mode and dark, I go brush my teeth and drag myself to the bedroom. Phew!!! After making sure alarm is on, pillows are in their preferred location and I start my prayer. I say "start" because I can't remember the last time I finished a bedtime one. And in the morning, when I can barely wake up, I tell myself that I need to start going to bed earlier. But I sleep better knowing I've battened down the hatches every evening and all is safe and sound, so I guess I'll have to keep the checklist for now.

Plenty of years to sleep, right?