Menu
Done is done
"Time to pay the piper."
"Stand up and take it like a man."
"Face the music."
All are phrases that in some sectors of our culture are seldom heard these days, but I heard all of these and more while I was growing up. And, I confess, I used all of these and more while raising my children.
It's all about accountability and taking responsibility for your own actions.
Sorely lacking, I know, in this day and age of shifted blame.
"My parents treated me cruelly. My dad never said 'I love you.' My mother was an alcoholic and I could never bring any friends home." The litany is endless. Some of the crimes perpetrated against children in their innocence truly are heinous and I don't mean to minimize those situations.
However, for every story of true abuse, our society accepts countless others that are nothing more nor less than the results of imperfect parents making imperfect decisions, based on the best, albeit imperfect, information available at the time of the decision.
In other words, get over it and cut them some slack, your turn's coming.
One of the scars from my childhood (which was less than perfect, by the way) is still tender to the touch. My dad was a great lecturer. He could go on for hours on end and had a memory like an elephant. He could recite chapter and verse for every childhood indiscretion by any one of his five children. This was no small feat. After all, we were all healthy, active and imaginative children. There was a lot to recount.
He also liked an audience. The fuller the house the better. So, not only did we have to relive our shame repeatedly, we had to relive it in the presence of our siblings and any other poor unfortunate within earshot.
These were grueling sessions I chose not to implement when disciplining my children. They were all healthy, active and imaginative children however, and brought their own fair share of indiscretions throughout the years. And we dealt with them straight-away, usually one-on-one unless it was a group indiscretion. And then, once the piper was paid, once the music ended, once the stand had been made and the punishment taken like a man, that was it. It was over.
Since Danny worked a swing shift for a good many years, and a lot of overtime throughout the years, much of this discipline was left to me. And although he was always aware of the children's actions, he seldom thought it necessary to revisit the crime once punishment was meted.
This is as it should be. This is, after all, how God deals with us. Even living in this age of grace, even living empowered by grace and all that it accomplishes in the lives of believers, I still miss the mark. Repeatedly. Sometimes it's because I'm hungry, angry, lonely or tired. Sometimes it's just plain carelessness. Too often, it is a burst of latent rebellion, rearing its ugly head once again. Whatever it is, it is sin. And, because I know that my sin will find me out, (Numbers 32:23) I'm never surprised to find myself confronted and challenged. Will I hold onto my rebellion, my sin? Or will I turn away from it, face the music, pay the piper and take my punishment "like a man?"
Because once I do, that's it. God promises that he removes our sin as far as the "east is from the west" (Psalm 103:12) and that "he will remember them no more." (Jeremiah 31:34)
Listening to someone indiscriminately recount another's indiscretion makes me cringe. Inevitably, I am, in my mind's eye, sandwiched between Debi and David on the couch, red with embarrassment, sometimes for myself, sometimes for them, while Dad rails. And I long for the shelter of love.
After all, **"Love covers a multitude of sins." 1 Peter 4:8 (NIV)
Things you won't see in heaven:
scorecards
Audio from KNGN 1360 AM: